Expectation Reduces the Joy.

So true that we all reduce our own joy by having different expecations. Why? Why do we make up an image or situation in our minds without actually knowing the reality? What leads us to make decisions for others actions? Why do we HAVE expectations?

Desperate.

eat snickers and peanute m&m's - satisfy my craving.
to excercise and look good - stay fit and fit-in.
to keep up with 'fashion' - enjoy clothes and make-up.

to learn a new programming language - be marketable in the market.
understand technology better - be able to have an intelligent coversation.
to go back to gradschool - be educated.
do well financially - have a lavish life.

have one long conversation with my dad - share happiness and tell him we are OK.
share things with mom and sister - Advise, suggestions.
spend lots and lots of time with my husband - have a family.
to be near friends - Someone to smile with other than family.
to not be desperate - impossible.

Life is always desperate.... one may not realize it, but we all have some desperations or the other. Really.

troop

when the word troop comes up, you automatically think of group, set, cluster... and as simple as a circle of friends. I've always had a good friend circle. I was born and raised in Kolhapur, India. So, where I lived, everyone spoke marathi. Even the non-marathi's knew how to speak the language. But when I moved to the United states, the only marathi spoken people I knew were my family members. Now, everyone at school only spoke english. So it was either speak english and be their friend or shut up. I picked up the language along with the accent (rather i tried) and I succeded. I think.

Well, over the weekend, I was on the phone with my sister in law who lives in bombay. Her daugther (my neice) Anisha is only 3 years old. She goes to school for 2 hours a day. Bombay being the mixing bowl.. full of different types of people who speak differentl languages. It's understandable that the schools are full of variety of people.

Anisha's parents are very strict about the fact that they want their daughter to speak good marathi. Many kids in bombay only speak english and absolutely have no clue about their mother tongue. Obviously Anisha's parents do not want anisha to be one of those "english-spoken kids with no knowledge of own mother lang."

Understandable.

But, is that a good thing? Is Anisha understanding this already and taking actions which she shouldnt? Does she know that she is only suppose to talk to people in Marathi? How is she handling this you ask? .... Well.... there are 20-30 some students in her class. She is in school for 2 hours a day. The classroom is full of all types of kids. Come to realize, Anisha and the others somehow formed a troop of their own. Troops..which only speak in a specific language. Anisha now only has friends who speak marathi. There is another group of kids who only speak gujurati, then punjabi, so on and so forth.

I wonder, how many kids did she try to talk to before she realized that she doesnt understand them. How does a 3 year old do the "same language spoken hunt?" Amazing how she made the decision of blocking everyone else out but the Marathi kids. Howz the brain working? Whats the troop sorting process? I wonder! ...

Cheers!

Jokes, smiles, music, sun, the moon, fun times...

All is back and well.

cd burn.

Oh gosh...analogy again?

I burned some CD's of songs and started listening to them in my car. I was so excited. I love the fact that I can carry them around with me. But, come to realize, after last weekend my excitement just went down. Chinmay dropped pepsi on some of the CD's. So to clean them I was trying to grab them carefully out of the compartment and accidently dropped some on the ground -- with rocks and what not in the parking lot. They are not the same anymore - they've been scratched. Songs skip, get stuck and keep repeating the same word, some stop and some are absolutely fine!

Life can be a CD of burned emotions. Don't you think? I think so. CD of life.... we keep spilling freezing cold and burning hot truths and lies all over it. Drop it on the ground of broken dreams, shattered hopes. It doenst stay the same after picking it back up - it's been poked by the sharp edges of the broken dream and stained by the shattered hope tears. Emotions jump up and down, we get stuck at being sad and dwell over little things - again and again. OR, sometimes, we wipe it off with a clean cloth made up of understandings and compromises. If it still skips, and stops, some just throw it away and get a new one....a brand new one! Does it sound the same? or better?

down.

busy week
out of smiles and energy

sun was hiding
clouds were 'it'

eyes were seeking light
though the darkness was lit

air was dull
breeze was a little rough

time was up
and i was down.

One Sip At a time ... Quenced Thirst.

One bite at a time ... Satisfied tummy.

One year at a time ... well guided.

One Note at a time... Beautiful Tune.

One Line at a time... Sweet Song.

Many thoughts at a time ... Worry.

One Word at a time ... Dictionary.

One Beat at a time ... Life!