One step at a time...

It hurts...

It kills some of us to see others being hurt. A very very dear friend of mine called me today and shared her "break-up" news with me. For a second my heart just skipped. I didn't know what to say. There was this slight silent moment and before she realized, I said something so "usual", "What happened?" --despite of actually knowing all the answers, I still asked, gave me some time to gather emotions,thoughts and importantly 'myself' together.

Life can be a B!$@#. Sometimes it just comes at you like a bee. Stings you all over and leaves all those red marks for a while. Those stings of emotional breakdowns, tears, loss of self esteem and a whole bag full of other things sure take some time to heal. You need a lot of medicine -- medicine of talks with closed ones, time to discover things about yourself, books, music, reality check and 10 bags full of advice and patience to make your 'hurt-skin' go back to normal... back to being Thick. It makes you ready for more stings, but this time around you are wiser -- you'v learned how to run away from the poisonious bee's of life! RUN!!!! Dont let them win... cuz you know what... you are the Winner..of your own life --- Maybe!

Knocking on the Invisible Wall

How did i see it? well i didnt, someone told me about theirs and i realized i had one myself. Well where is it? its around me and the doors to them are our very own words.

You meet an individual and you have a first impression, Good/Bad/No comments. Then you meet them again and your opinion may change about the person, may remain the same or again, have no opinion at all. Though, the more you meet/talk to the person the more you start coming closer and closer, well how close? how close can you be to a person? People say, 'so and so' is my best friend we know everything about eachother. how do they reach that point? do they just base on the number of years you have known eachother or could it have anything to do with the fact that you and the other person just mesh so well together? could be either one.

Many times we are NOT what we appear to be for the ones around us. At work people may think you are so organized yet at home you have clothes and books all over your room. you maybe the sweetest person around your friends but throw crazy tantrums at mom/dad/sis or bro.you may say yes to many No's you smile at many frowns, and you may very well pretend! We all do it knowingly, unknowingly-- but its done!

Invisible walls are built by our very ownself, they are made up of secrets untold, the feelings unspoken, the hate held within, the anger boxed up, the tears hidden, the unshown cruelty, the over-powering ego, self gained selfishness, and a lot more emotions piled on top of eachother. Boy, What a strong wall! It sure is pretty hard for someone to break-through and walk inside. Funny, some people use so many of their love skills and word tools and still can never break through it. yet some dont even try and can enter right through them.

How do you let that person have the password to go/see through your invisible walls? How do you determine with whom u will only discuss fashion vs. serious topics? How do you tell when you're passing through other people's invisible wall? Or is our own wall so invisible that we might run into it ourselves?

spilling the truth...

I would like to thank everyone for participating in this silly game, as keshi has said. It was a fun activity. Definitely made me think of some things about my ownself. How many times do you get the opportunity to LIE on purpose... well the writers of blogvilla make it possible for you. ;) Cudos*
Not many of you know me so well as i havnt done 99 facts about myself, nonetheless, you still gave it a shot. High fives again!
Enjoy the results!

I was a popular runner back in school and broke running records – True. I have been trained as a runner since I was 11 years old. Won Nationals in 92 back in India and ran as the Jr. Olympic runner for the states of Ohio and Pennsylvania from 1994-1998. Oh and yaa.. I DONT run anymore nor i miss it. Pheww!

I am a Kathak dancer – True. I do it every Tuesday night for 2 hours (though taking this whole month off)

I have difficult time reading clocks without numbers – True. I can’t do this quickly at all, another thing I can’t do is walk and drink at the same time.

I am a huge “In-Styles” person, be it clothes, make up, technology, home related things, etc., and read some sort of material/magazine EVERY day – True. I am a hardcore woman. And Yes I do read something EVERY single day. It’s a habit.

I can roller blade (in-line skating) backwards – True. Been skating since I was 8.

I love New York City – True. I have been visiting NYC since I was 14 or 15 and make it a point to go there once or twice in two years or sometimes a year. I love putting nice clothes on, grabbing my purse with some blank napkins and a pen, getting on that subway, and going to random places in NYC, holding a Venti frappachino in my hand from starbucks and writing on those napkins or reading away in an open café/garden. Love it!

I want 4 kids – False. I absolutely adore kids and love them but I can’t even come close to think of having 4 of them. I might fail adoring and loving them so much. I just want two kids. One boy and one girl =)

I dip Parley-G biscuits in my tea/coffee almost every other morning – True. Been doing it since a little girl, love it.

I love sheer/chiffon sari’s with sleeveless blouses – True. Glad to be an Indian woman. I think sari is one of the most beautiful yet sexiest attires ever.

I like imaginations. – True. Hardcore true. As much as I love to talk and be around other people, I need my alone time. My imaginations love me and so they only visit me when I am alone, I am selfish when it comes to them too. Again, I have loved imaginations since I was a girl and they are my friends, best friends and relatives… I let them visit me at all times. “My imaginations are an imagination themselves.”

Cheers to all my mates! =)

*Keshi, thank you.

Invisible Wall

Tagged to Lie.

I wasn’t playing the "lie and tag" in the blog-villa with the blog family, and even as a spectator I have been tagged….. by Keshi.. tells a lot about this “netship”… Very friendly and inviting…

*blogvilla was an inspiration from Arjun

one of the following ten statements about me is a full hearted fiction. Which one? Take a guess! I will post the answer on August 29th (Monday).

Keshi’s inspiration… thanks once again…and with that said Search the ‘non-true fact’!

1. I was a popular runner back in school and broke running records

2. I am a Kathak dancer

3. I have difficult time reading clocks without numbers

4. I am a huge “In-Styles” person, be it clothes, make up, technology, home related things, etc., and read some sort of material/magazine EVERY day

5. I can roller blade (in-line skating) backwards

6. I love New York City

7. I want 4 kids

8. I dip Parley-G biscuits in my tea/coffee almost every other morning

9. I love sheer/chiffon sari’s with sleeveless blouses

10. I like imaginations.


Enjoy!
*** i'd like to tag Suyash... shonu i am sorry i dindt tag you, i thought you wouldn't like this activity..... but hey u'll enjoy it =)
I'd like to tag Chinmay, Razia, Reshma, Gaurav, Puneet, and Arjun.

Go Google....Nice Job...yet again!

http://www.google.com/talk

fly.

A girl and a guy fell in love
said the girl, Let us Fly
Float up in the sky
so they did, as would the dove.

IKEA Addiction!

Addiction

google says: Compulsive physiological and psychological need for a habit-forming substance. Habitual psychological and physiological dependence on a substance or practice beyond one's voluntary control.

keeping the addiction
here is a dedication.... to IKEA

different types of Poetry i like...

Haiku

IKEA's a need
its not good its not bad
I am addicted to it.

Cinquain

IKEA
Modern,affordable
strolling, looking, buying
excited, happy, overwhelmed, energetic
SHOP

Acrostic

Imagination brought into reality
Knowledge of design made easy to understand
Energy flowing atmosphere
Art imitates life, life imitates art.

TERSE VERSE (something found at IKEA...)

Rare
Chair

Simile

IKEA is as COOL
as an ice Cube


For the ones who don't know what IKEA is.. "Affordable solutions for better living"..check it out yourself: www.ikea.com

Thank you...

God, for letting me be here
Mummy and Pappa, for giving birth to me
Didi, for being the best sister and a guardian, letting me be myselft and still loving me and most importanly putting up with my crap TILL THIS DAY.
Chinmay, for making a difference in my life
Aai baba, for accepting me with tremendeous love
Teachers, for giving me excellent knowledge (limited due to lack of acceptance from my end, yet excellent)
Cousins, for being family and good times while growing up
Family, for encouragement and positive thoughts
Friends, for being there, giving great advice and laughing with me -- Nima and Razia - Thank you for not making me feel like i need to thank you guys!
Shivani, for chatting with me on MSN
Admirers, for teaching me new things about life
Weather, for making me realize i love Spring
Flowers, for putting a smile on my face
Music, for taking me on a emotional ride (good and bad)
Dance, for bringing the me out
Chocolates, for letting me eat you
Ice cream(butter peacan), for letting me scoop you out and be in my tummy
Shoes, for making my feet look beautiful (sorry for being a pain sometimes)
Phone, for connecting me with all the loved ones
Laptop, for letting me pound on you at all times
Security guard, for holding the door open
Elevator, for avoiding my walking up and down 8 flights of the office
Car, for getting me stuck in traffic and giving me the opportunity to think and listen to music
Lipgloss, for letting me let you shine on me
pen, for letting me scribble aboslutely nothings and everythings
H2O/Air/Food, for keeping me alive
Franklin covey proj Mgmt guide, for getting me on track
Camera, for letting me capture good times to reminisce back
Scarft and sweaters, for being warm towards me
Wet mud, for smelling so nice
Manicurist/pedicurist, Ahhhhhhh, you are good
Books, for teaching me so many words
Blogs, for letting me blog my thoughts and read what others have to say
Curling irons, despite of burns on my neck i still love you
Stuffed toys, for letting me squeeeeeez you
Purse, for stuffing all the crap in you
Emotions, for making me realize that things hurt

and just .... Thank You... for everything!

Speical Note: Hats off to my friend AVANI: I need to be somewhat "perfectionist" like her. She gets up every morning, works out at the gym, gets ready and goes to work by 9:00 am! Solute!

Random Questions from Arjun's Blog!

What time did you get up this morning? – 8:10 am

Formals or Casuals? –mixture of the two.

What was the last film you saw at the cinema? – Mr. & Mrs. Smith.

What is your favorite TV show? – Sex and the City

What is your middle name? – Currenty its Amrit, soon it will be Chinmay!

Which is your favorite perfume/Deodorant? – I have more than one …(in this order) Issy Miyaki, Hugo Boss, Curve, 5th Ave. Deo: Dove

What is your favorite cuisine? – Indian and Italian

What is your favorite drink? –umm again, I like more than one….i cant really be discriminating these things… Cranberry juice, Mango Lassiiiiiiiiii, Mango a go go from Jumba Juice, My sister’s home made smoothies, Caramel Frappochino and Macchiato from Starbucks and H2O.

What is your favorite CD at the moment? – Some tracks from Mangal Pandey, Some from Paheli and Parineeta

What kind of vehicle do you drive? – BMW 325i – I love it!

What is your Favorite sandwich? – Quizno’s Monterey Club!

What characteristics do you despise? - Dishonesty ( I agree with Arjun here)

What is your Favorite item of clothing? – My Bebe Jeans with a cute top!

If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation, where would you go? – Europe

What color is your bathroom? – Off white with sky blue decoration

What color pants are you wearing? – Beige with pink and brown stripes

Where would you retire to? – havn’t thought about it.

What is your Favorite time of the day? – Mornings! I love waking up and spalshing my face with water and thanking god for another lovely morning!

What was your most memorable birthday? – All of them! My family rocks:)

What's the last thing you ate? – I had coffee – so I drank it.

If you were a crayon, what color would you be? - Maroon

What is your Favorite flower? – Any exotic flowers!

Coke or Pepsi? – Pepsi Please!

Do you wish on stars? - Nope

What is your shoe size? – 8 sometimes 7.5 in nine west!

Do you have any pets? – Nope, but I’d like a puppy!

Last person you talked to on the phone? –Chinmay

What did you want to be when you were little? – A professional Runner

What are you meant to be doing now? –This exact thing! haha.

What do you first notice about someone? –how well they carry a conversation out.

What was your favorite toy as a child? – everything which belonged to my sister.

Summer or winter? - Spring

Hugs or Kisses? – Hugs for friends, kisses for family

Chocolate or vanilla? – Chocolate

Living arrangements? – 3 days with mom rest with Chinmay.

When was the last time you cried? –while watching Sex and the City when Carrie learns that Big is married and reads the newspaper ad with Chorlette. She was so broken =( it hurt!

What is under your bed? –Empty Shopping bags, and some misc things

How many countries have you visited? – 3

In how many cities have you lived? – In this order---Kolhapur, Canton, Akron, Northridge, and now Santa Barbara

Favorite movie of all time? – Hera Pheri and Andaz Apna Apna

Mountains or beach? – SB is perfect, the beach is one side and the mountain on the other! Gorgeous!

The current friend you have known the longest? –Nima and Razia – two of my best friends! And of course my very own sister Pooja!

Full names of your potential kids? – oh this is a bad question…. Chinmay and I are going to have world war three b4 answering this!

What is your usual bedtime? – Varies but try to sleep by 10:30 or 11:00 pm

What is your favorite past time after office? –going home and relaxing!

If you had the opportunity to be in someone's else's shoes – My mom. Just to learn how she raised us so I can somewhat come close to her, if any, while raising my kids

If your life were a poem/song, which one would it be? “Pretty Woman, Walking down the street” By Roy Orbison!

If you could change three things about yourself, what would they be? Nothing! I am content with myself.

Happy Independence Day

To all of you :)

Habit-s .. Bad and Good!

Says Google: "A recurrent, often unconscious pattern of behavior that is acquired through frequent repetition. An established disposition of the mind or character. "

Lipgloss (MAC)

Chaptstick
Nivia Face Creme
Bath & Body works or Victoria Secret Body Lotions
Neutrogena Face Wash and scrub
Sabatian/Bumble and Bumble Hair products

Pedicures

Hairbands

Issy Miyaki
Magainzes and books
Music
Laptop
iPOD

Bright White Lights
Candles
Exotic Flowers
Internet,Trillian and MSN Messenger
www.google.com
gmail.google.com

blogs
102.7 KIIS FM
One Cup of Coffee (throwing 1/4 of it away)
Half cup of tea
Graham Crackers with Hershey Milk Chocolate
Krispy Kreme donuts

Fresh Fruit Smoothies
Mcdonalds 3 Chocolate Chip Cookies
GIANT ice cream cone at any Gas Station
Taco Bell
Pad Thai with chicken and peanuts
Pizza's and Pastas

99 cents Carl Jr. Spicy Chicken Sandwich
Dove Milk Chocolate
Sex and the City
Kareena Kareena and Jaisi Jaise Koi Nahi
Jeans

Smiles

Dance

Long conversations with my sister (bitching abt others included)
walk on Brand Blvd in Glendale
slightly biting the bottom lip (my own)
Pacing back and forth in my cube while on the phone
sitting with both legs up in a chair
walking barefoot around the office (i am taking a pair of flipflops at work finally)

Small talk/Long talk
Photos
lying in bed for no reason
talking to myself (weirdo)

singing like a rockstar with a water bottle in my hand as a microphone
raising eyebrows and nodding in meetings
Imitating people
Baskets - All types
Grapes and Bananas

Dried cranberries
Parley G Glucose biscuits
wearing my husband's t-shirts
laughing with him...
adoring him..
and just being with him!!

and more.... lot more!

Is life like a train?

On a beautiful April morning, I was standing at the Northridge train station platform, waiting for my train to arrive. As I looked here and there, just like that well felt wandering breeze, a thought came by and whispered in my ear…“Hey, you think life is like a train?”

I don’t know. Is it? Do you know? Do you think our life is like a train? Gosh! I, I really don’t know. Here I scribble away and take a shot at it.

If life were to be like a train, we would be made up of different compartments, the compartment of being born, being a child, growing up, and finally being an adult. It’s like; we were given the ticket of entrance by ‘mom’ to be on the train of life. Many try’s to keep us on track by ‘parents and teachers’ as growing up to be somewhat stable. The energy may have been contributed to us by our siblings, guardians, friends, etc. just to keep on moving ahead. Somewhere along the way, at some point we take the excess baggage of our burdens, decisions, responsibilities, and much more from ‘whomever’ to ourselves merely to embark on that “adulthood” compartment. All of a sudden, Whoooooooooooooosh! so fast all of those burdens, decisions, thoughts, responsibilities and yep much much more, is moving along with us. As we take the turns and go through those zigzags of emotions we become stronger and stronger. Likewise when we go through the tunnels of failures we learn to turn the light of patience on and be wiser by the moment. Similarly as the rocks, debris and dust of negatives, no’s, and disappointment come at us, we tend or rather try to let those bounce off of our metal thick skin. Simultaneously, we are stopping at different stations throughout the journey of life to pick up different things, people, areas, and “stuff.” Some come and go, some come and stay. And some come, make you realize that they’ve entered and they leave. Sometimes we don’t even realize what has boarded until “it” gets off and by the time we acknowledge its gone existence, it’s too late.

When do we come to an end? Whenever we wish to? Or do we have the burden of picking up and dropping off many through out the journey? Do you think we were given the ticket for free to enter but we might have to pay a lot more to exit?




Thoughts on this topic by different people.

Life is a train...it stops sometimes and sometimes goes really fast. it stops at some stations which you like. some which dont like. you see some stations come and go. some others you dont even know when they came and went. becuae you were sleeping. -- Chinmay. A good Husband! :)


It goes too fast! – Sharvari Khanvilkar , Little Cousin/ Businsess/Spanish Student at U of Cincy Ohio.

If u r used to fast, city life, like NY or LA etc...then yes, If u r staying in Akron, then no. Train corresponds to a fast track mind, which wants to do something or the other all the time.... city gives u that. Laid back life in small towns doesn't. Of course its my opinion. You may think differently. –Ravi Ayyer, Ph.D Candidate at Case Western Reserve University, Ohio.

Haha! Hmmm. i guess i am not so creative. cuz i am trying to think what a train does. that it makes it similar to life. stops and goes. get on get off. its fast. no clue - - Shivani Misra, Marketing Project Specialist @ J.D. Power & Associates

i would say ....life is more like a car thats stopped at a railway crossing .....u know its all ok till that inevitable train comes by – -More on the serious note: if u do want to compare life to a train then i guess you could call each passenger car , the years of your life .....sucks to be on the front cos its too noisy and sucks to be at the back cos u always miss the platform ......so i guess the moral of the analogy is to live the youth and enjoy it as much as we can Rushi Matkar, My very own Cupid and Ph.D Candidate at University of Akron, Ohio.

You can choose to get off at a stop and have that be ur destination, or u can wait until u find the right destination to stop. – Razia Hussain, Masters student of Communications at University of Akron, Ohio.

gotta keep on chuggin – Avani Parmar, Business Systems Analyst in LA based Bus/Tech Company.

if by that you meant it comes roaring through your life and takes away to some other place you weren’t even sure existed. Sumit – Programmer for a Start up Computer Firm in LA.

like people come to ur life and leave.. just the way passangers get into train and leave when their destination comes.. Ashminder Kaur, Student

[yeah - it depends how deep we got into it. There is definitely more than one way to think about life i think. You can make it into a train - but you can also make it into a machine. Or you can turn life into a camera. So I think it can be a train - and it can be anything. Life is like a question with no answer to me. And that's the point - you stop thinking when you have the answer. It's the search of the answer that is the key. oops.. i'm getting philosophical again. But I can tell you one thing. If we knew that life was just a train and only a train - then life would be over because there is no more life if there are no more questions on what it is.
This life is one train ticket to somewhere else. and death is when you get off the train and either transfer or enter a new place. But it is also easy to break up the anology with little problems that come up in it... Rishi Oswal: Entrepreneur, San Diego, Ca


Life is like a bus, it has many stops and also stops at a lot of signals and meets a lot of people. Trains mein jyaada signal nahi aate hain, and it doesnt go thru traffic jams, very often so i think its more comparable to a bus aise main naye ubharte llekhakon ko ideas dete rehta hoon
and then sometimes u do things for others, similar to when u offer ur seat to people, and urself go thru a trouble, without even frowning abt it, but then u also come across people who are comfortably sitting at their seats but dont like other peoples bags touching them similar to life
when people who r sitting pretty at their place, can be modest and kind, or can be arrogant
and jerks` Jeetu: Civil Engineer --- San Fran, CA.

* Sorry Avani for spelling your last name incorrectly. I fixed it. =)

Written words or spoken words --- Thats the Question!

Just a random email I wrote to a couple we saw at a party not too long ago. They gifted us a very nice baking set and invited us on a trip. Lovely couple. Below is what I wrote them as a little thank you Note... Makes me wonder.. Are emails sometimes better than actual words? Do we sometimes tell more through the written words than the spoken ones? I wonder .....

Enjoy!

To ___ & ____,

How are you two doing? First of all I wanted to thank you both for thelovely gift. It surely is very nice or rather functional. Considering the fact that I am an absolute slave to cakes and cookies, you couldn't have gifted anything more valuable than this to put a smileon my Face. I shall definitely take an advantage of those lovely utensils and fullfill my " always hungry for sweets" tummy with delicious baked goods.

Stepping away from cakes, cookies, thank you's and nice's, it waswonderful seeing the two of you at the party.

With Lots of love,

Pallavi and Chinmay!